Exploring OCD, Anxiety, and Creative Brilliance with Taneesha Luv!
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Exploring OCD, Anxiety, and Creative Brilliance with Taneesha Luv!
Mental health and faith can feel like a battleground, especially when OCD, anxiety, and trauma are part of the journey. In this raw and honest episode of Sunburnt Souls, Taneesha Luv shares her powerful testimony of navigating mental illness, faith, and healing.
In this episode, we explore:
Overcoming anxiety and OCD as a Christian
Healing from sexual trauma through faith in Christ
How mental illness affects relationships—and how to navigate it
Why worship is a weapon in the fight for mental well-being
The tension of suffering and faith—why God still pursues us even in darkness
If you've ever wrestled with your mind, doubted your worth, or struggled to see light in the darkness, this episode is for you.
Taneesha’s story is one of resilience, faith, and finding hope in Jesus—even when life doesn’t make sense. Tune in to Sunburnt Souls and be reminded: You are not alone, and God is not done with you yet.
Dave Quak:
All right, well, all silliness is about to prevail because I am here with one of my favourite humans on the entire planet. Taneesha, how are you?
Taneesha Luv: I'm good, thank you.
Dave Quak: Good, good. You used to be Taneesha Gray, but now you're Taneesha Luv—which is such an amazing name! But it's not "Love" like L-O-V-E. It has all these little symbols around the letters. What are those things called, and why are they there?
Taneesha Luv: I have no idea what they're called. And they're not technically part of my name.
Dave Quak: Then why are they there?
Taneesha Luv: Because Facebook doesn't recognise "Luv" as a normal last name.
Dave Quak: So it just adds them? I think they’re called circumflexes. Weird, right?
Taneesha Luv: I don’t really know. But to change my name, I had to use those, or else Facebook thought I was a fraud or something. It's weird.
Dave Quak: That is weird. Facebook does a lot of weird things.
Taneesha Luv: Yep.
Dave Quak: So, what's been going on? What do you do these days? You used to be a chippy. For our international friends, a "chippy" is a carpenter. Did you go straight into your apprenticeship after school?
Taneesha Luv: No, actually, straight out of school, I studied criminology for a semester. Then I realised I wanted to do something more hands-on. So I left that, worked for a bit, saved up, and then did a certificate in construction to test the waters. I wanted to see what I liked and didn’t like—and I found out I really loved carpentry. So then I started my apprenticeship.
Dave Quak: Right! That was during the years we first met you. You finished your apprenticeship, and now?
Taneesha Luv: Now I'm studying a Bachelor of Occupational Therapy. I'm in my third year, with one more to go.
Dave Quak: That’s a tough degree. Are you getting good marks?
Taneesha Luv: Yes.
Dave Quak: So you're one of those surprise packages—you can build a house and also ace exams about the human body?
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, somehow!
Dave Quak: Not everyone can do that, Taneesha. Now, your name—Taneesha—it’s not your typical name for a girl from Beenleigh, is it?
Taneesha Luv: No, not really.
Dave Quak: So where does it come from?
Taneesha Luv: My mum thought she made it up.
Dave Quak: She actually thought she invented it?
Taneesha Luv: Yep!
Dave Quak: That’s so cute.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, well, the spelling at least. Eventually, I met a few other Taneeshas, but they all spell it differently. So mine is unique in that way, I guess. It means "born on a Monday," and funnily enough, I was born on a Monday!
Dave Quak: Oh wow. Did your mum know that when she named you?
Taneesha Luv: No, she had no idea!
Dave Quak: That’s really cool.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah!
How Faith Transformed My Life: My Journey to Jesus
Dave Quak: So, Taneesha, you’re a Christian. Is that true? How did you meet Jesus?
Taneesha Luv: Oh wow, that’s a big question!
Dave Quak: I know, right? But just for some context, what was it like the first time we met you at church? What was that experience like for you?
Taneesha Luv: I had just moved to Tugun from Beenleigh, and I knew absolutely no one except for my boss, who I was living with at the time, and his girlfriend. I figured church people are usually friendly—mostly.
Dave Quak: That’s a good reputation for the church to have!
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, exactly! So I thought church was my best bet for making friends and finding some kind of community. I googled "churches in Tugun" and just showed up—drunk.
Dave Quak: Yeah, I remember that!
Taneesha Luv: I was at a point where that was just my daily routine. But yeah, I met you guys and...
Dave Quak: And we just welcomed you as you were. Honestly, I’m happy for that. If that’s what it took for you to walk through the doors of a church, then I think that’s great. You were in a place where you needed that.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah.
Dave Quak: So, what was that place like for you?
Taneesha Luv
I think I just knew the way I was living wasn’t great, but I was also questioning a lot about myself. I didn’t have any solid sense of who I was, and that doubt created a lot of fear inside me. I wasn’t ready to face it—either for myself or for others.
Dave Quak
What were you scared of? What was your hesitation?
If you or anyone you know is in need or crisis please call the National Sexual Assault, Domestic and Family Violence Counselling Service on 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732) or Lifeline 131 114.
Healing from Sexual Trauma: Finding Hope in Jesus
At that time, I had already experienced some sexual trauma, and that made me question my sexuality. On top of that, I didn’t really want to live. I felt lost, like I had no real place in the world. Every day was a struggle, and it kept getting worse. Drinking became my escape from the reality inside my head, but I quickly realised it didn’t actually help—it just made everything worse.
Dave Quak
Like a band-aid or a mask?
Taneesha Luv
Yeah, exactly. I held up a mask for a long time, but looking back, it only made things harder. It gave me even more things to work through than I had before.
Dave Quak
Sexual trauma is such a heavy topic, and people don’t talk about it much—especially in the church. When that happened to you, what did it do to your mind as a young woman?
Taneesha Luv
Since it happened more than once, I started to question if I was the problem. At first, I blamed men, thinking they were the ones at fault. But as it kept happening, I wondered, “What am I doing wrong? Is this my fault?” It really damaged my self-worth. It also messed with my idea of love—like, what kind of love I actually deserved.
Dave Quak
That’s heavy. But you’ve come such a long way, and we’ve seen real breakthrough in your life—we’ll get to that. But when you were in the middle of it all, were you questioning God as well?
Taneesha Luv
Yeah, definitely. It was messy because I grew up in a Christian home—I went to church every Sunday, did the whole “Christian thing.” I even got baptised when I was 14 or 15, but I didn’t do it for the right reasons.
Dave Quak
What do you mean?
Taneesha Luv
I’ve always been a people pleaser, and I think I just did it because I thought that’s what the church wanted.
Dave Quak
So, were you trying to please the pastors? Your parents?
Taneesha Luv
Not consciously, but I thought the church wanted to see young people growing, sharing their testimonies, bringing friends to church. So, I just followed the pattern. But I didn’t actually have a real relationship with God. I wasn’t really praying or connecting with Him. Even when I shared my testimony that day, I wrote it in a way that would make people cry.
Dave Quak
You were trying to manipulate the moment?
Taneesha Luv
Yeah, exactly. It wasn’t authentic. Not long after that, I fell into deep depression. I felt like God had betrayed me. That’s when I went to the extreme and thought, “Maybe the devil could be my friend.”
Dave Quak
Wow.
Taneesha Luv
Yeah… I actually prayed and told the devil that if he would be my friend, then I would be his. After that, I struggled to even step foot in a church. That’s when everything started spiraling.
But the reason I bring this up is because the sexual trauma didn’t just happen back then—it also happened after I found my way back to God.
Dave Quak: It still kept happening.
Taneesha Luv: So, yeah, I guess I was angry at God then, but it was a different kind of anger.
Anne Lamott
I’ve been angry at God. I’ve been angry with myself. But I’m learning that anger doesn’t get me anywhere
Dave Quak: Was it because you were expecting, like, "Okay, I'm a Christian now, I'll be protected. This stuff doesn’t happen to me anymore." Or was it something else?
Taneesha Luv: I think I was angry in the way that... I guess I just felt more. I was angry at God for letting men do that—Christian men. Yeah. That really hurt me, and I was angry at God about it.
Dave Quak: Understandably. Especially because God reveals Himself as a father so often in the Bible. Did that skew your perspective, associating God with masculinity?
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, I think it skewed my whole vision of what love is. That was the biggest thing—it messed up my understanding of love.
Dave Quak: And you said you fell into depression. What did that look like for you?
Taneesha Luv: It looked like self-harm—a lot of it. Suicidal ideation. Isolating myself. I was in an elite training team for karate, and I just started pulling away from that. Just the typical symptoms of depression, really.
Dave Quak: That’s heavy. Especially self-harm—so you actually took a knife to yourself?
Taneesha Luv: Yeah. Yeah, I did.
Dave Quak: For people who’ve never understood self-harm, what was the desire behind it? Why do it?
Taneesha Luv: That’s a hard question to answer. For me, it was to check if I could still feel something. I felt so numb, like I had put up so many walls that I didn’t even think I was capable of human emotions anymore. That was my way of testing—"Hey, can you still feel?"
And then, strangely, there was a sense of euphoria afterward, but it was immediately followed by regret.
Dave Quak: Yeah, someone else I spoke to about this said the same thing. There was a release in the pain that felt good—temporarily.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah.
Dave Quak: And then it was just back to the regret and brokenness.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah.
Dave Quak: Were you on any medication during that time?
Taneesha Luv: Not when it first began. But I think at some point, yeah, I was.
Dave Quak: You were quite young then. You’ve had quite the journey with mental ill health. What’s it been like since then?
Taneesha Luv: I definitely have anxiety.
How can Christians find peace in God while living with anxiety?
Mum says I basically came out of the womb anxious, and that’s never really changed. It’s always been something I’ve experienced. But when I was younger, we didn’t really have the language for it. I just thought I was nervous and shy. But yeah, I have anxiety.
How should Christians understand OCD from a faith-based perspective?
I also have OCD—obsessive-compulsive disorder—and I experience bouts of depression. I don’t want to say I have a depressive disorder. I don’t think that’s actually the case. I just think I experience depression sometimes.
Dave Quak: Yep. So for you, it's more the anxiety and OCD. Are you on any kind of SSRI for the anxiety?
Taneesha Luv: No, not at the moment. I was on fluoxetine for about four years, but I was tapering off it and came off completely at the beginning of this year.
Dave Quak: Oh wow. So you're not currently on anything?
Taneesha Luv: Nope.
Dave Quak: How's that going? And what about the OCD—what does that look like for you?
Taneesha Luv: It looks like a lot of things. It kind of changes over time. One of the big ones for me is PowerPoints. People joke about it, but you've actually got one over there—I was eyeing it off. It’s underneath the table.
Dave Quak: It’s on, but nothing’s plugged into it.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, nothing plugged in. That’s been a thing for a while.
Dave Quak: I remember years ago making a joke about it with you, but now that I know it's an OCD thing, it's not funny.
Taneesha Luv: No, it’s not. And that's the thing—there’s a big misconception about OCD. People think it’s just about cleanliness or a preference for order, but it’s so much deeper than that. It can be really debilitating. So I get frustrated when people say, "Oh, I’m so OCD."
Dave Quak: Yeah, or when people joke, "I wish my wife was OCD about cleaning."
Taneesha Luv: Bro, you don’t wish that. It’s horrible.
Dave Quak: So it really consumes you?
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, it consumes me.
Dave Quak: In what way?
Taneesha Luv: Ritualistic things that I have to do, or I feel like my whole day—or even my week—could be completely wrecked. I do have the cleanliness side of things too. Certain textures on my hands can freak me out, and I need to wash them a certain number of times. I also have a need for order and structure, and any deviation from that just wrecks me.
Dave Quak: That sounds really debilitating. So the texture thing with your hands—is that something you encounter daily?
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, definitely.
Dave Quak: So imagine something every single day irritating you. I think with mental illness, people who don’t experience it—God bless them, I wouldn’t wish this on anyone—just don’t understand what it’s like to have to deal with something every single day in a ritualistic way. That’s terrible.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, and it’s really isolating too. I was managing okay before I came off my medication.
Dave Quak: Okay.
Taneesha Luv: But I came off because I have other health issues and wanted to have a clean slate—no chemicals in my body—so I could figure out what I actually need and what my actual diagnoses are. I’m still a bit up in the air about that because there’s a lot of overlap with different conditions.
Dave Quak: That makes sense.
Taneesha Luv: The first two weeks off the meds, I thought, "Wow, I’m doing great!" Then everything came crashing down, and the OCD got so much worse. It got to the point where I had to miss days of work. I was really struggling to go to uni at the time too.
Dave Quak: Wow.
Taneesha Luv: And my job isn’t even a high-stress environment—I work in a warehouse with motorbike parts. It’s pretty dirty, but I used to handle it fine. Then one day, I walked in, touched something, and froze. I had to be physically moved in front of my manager to explain what was happening. From that point on, I had to wear gloves at work.
Dave Quak: Wow.
David Beckham has revealed how living with his “tiring” obsessive compulsive disorder leads him to spending hours cleaning and organising his home while the rest of his family are in bed.
C/O the Guardian
Taneesha Luv: I make do. I find ways to adapt. That’s probably where my creative brain comes in—I come up with ways to navigate life with these mental illnesses. But it’s still isolating. I was the only one wearing gloves at work, and every second person would ask, "What’s with the gloves?"
Dave Quak: Yeah.
Taneesha Luv: People were coming from a good place, but every time I had to decide—do I just lie and make up an excuse, or do I tell them, "I have OCD and I’m really struggling right now"? I struggle with that balance. Being vulnerable has hurt me in the past.
Dave Quak: Has it?
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, just in the sense of people knowing my business and using it against me.
Dave Quak: So, knowing that mental illness is there, do you feel like people gaslight you with triggers, or is it something else?
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, it's more about people exposing my struggles to others when they have no right to.
Dave Quak: Yeah, it’s weird how people do that. Someone finds out someone’s struggling with something and can't wait to tell others—like, "Oh, did you know they have anxiety?"
Taneesha Luv: Oh man, yeah.
Dave Quak: You know what’s even weirder? When Christians—I'm a Christian, so I can say this—use prayer chains or prayer boards as a way to gossip. Like, "Let's pray for them… they’re trying to get pregnant," or whatever.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, exactly.
Dave Quak: I don’t want to be too hard on people, but there’s a lot of bad practices when it comes to understanding mental illness. Imagine if someone rolled up to work in a wheelchair and everyone kept asking, "Oh, what happened?" It’d be inappropriate, right? But because it’s a mental thing, people feel like they have more liberty to pry.
Taneesha Luv: It’s so weird.
Dave Quak: Right?
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, I’ve definitely noticed that.
Dave Quak: So, you mentioned earlier that when you went back to work, your OCD got worse. Does that mean the same struggles intensified, or did new ones appear?
Taneesha Luv: It’s different for everyone, but for me, it was both.
Dave Quak: So, more things and worse things?
How Mental Illness Affects Relationships—and How to Navigate It
It got to a point where even the slightest touch on my skin felt painful. I’m not sure if that’s OCD or some other sensory issue, but it was really intense. I had such a rigid way of doing my day, and if anything disrupted it, I felt like everything was ruined.
Dave Quak: That must’ve been tough on the people around you.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah… my husband copped it the most.
Dave Quak: Loved ones always do, right? We let our guard down around them, and they say things we don’t want to hear.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, and that’s one of the hardest parts about mental illness—how much it impacts relationships. I hate that. So many traits that come with my mental health struggles are just awful traits to have in a relationship.
Dave Quak: And the frustrating part is that, because it’s an illness, you can’t just switch it off. I know some people might use mental illness as an excuse to be a jerk, but most of us don’t. If we could flip a switch and be fine, we absolutely would.
Dave Quak
Yeah, it's just a long-term struggle. You catch yourself doing things to the people you love that you know you shouldn't do, but you still do it anyway. It sucks.
Taneesha Luv
Yeah. That's exactly what I'm struggling with right now—trying to figure out how much of it is in my control and how much isn’t. I know there are things I could be doing to be better, but then there are things that feel completely out of my control. And when it happens, I just spiral. I know it's wrong, I know I love this person, and I want to love them better—but it still happens anyway. And that just sends me into another spiral.
Dave Quak
Oh. Do you ever feel any peace with that? How do you deal with that tension? That must be frustrating.
Taneesha Luv
I haven't figured that one out yet. I just end up spiraling and beating myself up over it.
Dave Quak
Yeah, and then it becomes a cycle. You say something from a place of mental health struggle, then you get angry at yourself for it, and that just makes it worse.
Taneesha Luv
Exactly. It's tough. It's not easy.
Dave Quak
Have you thought about how this fits into your faith? Like, do you have a working theology around it? How does this all connect spiritually for you?
Taneesha Luv
Oh, I don’t have any answers. I have more questions than anything.
Dave Quak
I’d love to hear where you’re at.
Taneesha Luv
Okay, so one thing I struggle with is that people say, "If you have the Holy Spirit, you should be producing the fruit of the Spirit—you should be joyful, patient, kind." But often, I'm not. I really struggle with joy. I don’t feel like I experience it the way people around me do, and that makes me envious. It's this sick cycle—I'm not experiencing the fruit of the Spirit like I think I should, which makes me question things even more.
Taneesha Luv
But then there’s this other side of me that knows I have the Holy Spirit. I've invited God into my life. I have a relationship with Him. I hear from Him. I understand His love and peace. And I know my life changed the moment I gave it to Him—anyone who knew me before and after could see it. It was night and day.
People used to tell me I had this darkness about me, and now I don’t. Even thinking about it now, I get chills because I know it’s real. What God has done in my life is undeniable. But my mental health feels like this barrier stopping me from fully living in His truth and sharing His joy with others. The joy thing has been really getting to me lately. We were at church not long ago, in the middle of worship, and all the kids were running around, just completely happy—pure joy. A friend turned to me and said, "Isn't that what we should have? Childlike faith? That kind of joy?" And I just burst into tears because I don’t have that.
Taneesha Luv
Why don’t I? What's wrong? Is it something I’ve done? Am I being punished? Or is it just my biology? Is this just how I’m wired? Or is this my calling—to live a life that includes suffering? Because we’re not promised a life without suffering. If anything, we know we’re going to suffer in this life.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, and some more than others. So I feel stuck in this space of, "There's this, but then there's that, and then there's that." And I know I have the Holy Spirit, so why? It makes me question myself—like, what am I doing that's stopping me from having joy, patience, kindness, and all those things? Do you have any thoughts on that?
Dave Quak: To your credit, if I know anyone who's hedged their bets and tried every possible thing, it’s you. I remember in the early days, you mentioned that prayer to Satan, then you had deliverance prayer, deep spiritual prayer…
Taneesha Luv: Yeah.
Dave Quak: And on top of that, you take care of your physical health, you're doing the work when it comes to self-awareness and growth, you're looking at your parents and seeing what's genetic—you're literally covering every base.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah…
Dave Quak: And I think that’s the most frustrating place to be.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, I think so. I just feel exhausted. I’m tired of trying to figure it all out. It’s frustrating being in this place where I’m aware of how complex mental health is—biological, environmental, spiritual, all of it. And I wonder, how much of each is shaping me? It makes it hard to know which tools to pull out of my toolbelt in the moment.
So I’ve just been using all the tools—praying, eating healthy, doing all the usual steps for well-being.
Dave Quak: But what happens if you do all of that, diligently, and nothing changes?
Taneesha Luv: Yeah… that’s frustrating. It’s disheartening.
Dave Quak: It is.
Taneesha Luv: I’ve really been struggling with that. I keep praying, "God, can You please heal me? Can You please just take this away from me?" Because it’s not just hurting me, it’s hurting the people around me. And I feel like it’s stopping me from reaching out and furthering the Kingdom.
So I’m like, why? Why would these things still be in place? But then… I also see the purpose in it. I see God working through it.
I remember when I was really struggling, I went to you, and before I had even experienced half the things I have now, you told me, "I think you're going to go through a lot of crap. I'm sorry, but I think you are. And I think God is going to use it to shape you into something unique, something that will help people."
I remember feeling so disheartened, thinking, "I already have enough. Why would I want to go through more?" But I’m starting to see it play out, slowly but surely.
Dave Quak: Yeah.
Have you been able to help others with their Mental Health?
I feel like I can empathise with so many different people now—people from different walks of life, different struggles—more than I ever could before. And when I step into my profession after I graduate, I think that’s going to be a huge part of it. Meeting people where they are, in their struggles, and truly understanding them.
Dave Quak: I agree. You asked if I had any insight, and honestly, I don't. It's so complicated. Even on this podcast, we’ve heard stories from people who’ve been set free in all kinds of different ways—there’s no exact pattern.
My take on it—and I'd love to hear your thoughts—is that sometimes, crap just happens. The world is broken. People can be cruel. DNA is breaking down. Everything’s in chaos, and hard things are inevitable. But it’s up to us how we respond—how we let it mold or shape us.
Some people might think that’s a bit defeatist, but I don’t know if it is…
Dave Quak: I just think that, in every person's life I've met, no one's had a smooth, easy journey. And even if it looks like they have, they're probably hiding something. Do you know what I mean?
Taneesha Luv: Yeah.
Dave Quak: It doesn't make it easier. It actually makes the gospel harder, but it makes it more attractive. At least Jesus is the antidote to our brokenness. It’s confusing and tough, but He’s the way through.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah. I think it’s kind of ironic. Since I asked Jesus into my life, I’ve had that hope. Even in the darkest times, compared to before, now I still have that glimmer of hope. It’s like, you can't stay stuck in the dark if there's light.
Taneesha Luv: Even in the darkest place, if there’s even a little light, you’re going to see. That’s the difference.
Dave Quak: Did you have to train yourself to see that light, or was it just through overcoming one struggle after another?
Taneesha Luv: I don’t think I needed to train myself. It was purely recognising Jesus’ love, receiving the Holy Spirit, and being in a relationship with God. That was enough to give me a lot of hope. The rest, though, depends on me a lot of the time.
Dave Quak: Yeah, we definitely have responsibilities, and we have to submit to what Jesus can do, trust Him for healing. You mentioned using all the tools in the toolbox, and I really like that. I try to use them all, too—well, except for exercise. I really hate exercise.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, you don't like sweating.
Dave Quak: I don’t like sweating. I don't like how goofy I look doing it, and I don't like that feeling. Honestly, I'd rather just deal with mental struggles than exercise. That sounds terrible, doesn’t it?
Taneesha Luv: You mentally exercise!
Dave Quak: Yeah, I just think myself into fitness, right?
Taneesha Luv: Oh gosh.
Dave Quak: But it’s true; we have all these tools to keep going. But man, it’s confusing and tough. Just because you're a follower of Jesus doesn’t mean there’s no darkness; it’s still there.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, but there’s light in the darkness.
Dave Quak: And I'm glad you’ve got that light in the darkness.
Taneesha Luv: Me too. I don’t think I'd be here if it weren’t for that.
Dave Quak: That’s such a heavy statement, but it’s probably true, considering the suicidal tendencies and self-harm you’ve been through. Without God, you might not have made it. Thank God He rescued you.
Does God still love me while i’m Anxious?
God just met me where I was. I remember when I first started meeting up with you, and we’d have coffee. I’d tell you all these random things going on in my life, and you’d say, “Holy moly, God is pursuing you.” And I was so angry, telling you, “I don’t want Him to pursue me. Don’t pray for me.” But you said, “You’ll thank Him one day for that.” And now, I am so thankful for that.
Dave Quak: Well, I’ve never seen someone get chased more vigorously than you.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, He definitely chased me down.
Dave Quak: And it wasn’t just like a gentle pursuit. It was relentless grace. Everywhere you turned, it was like something was pinning you to the truth.
Taneesha Luv: It’s actually insane.
Dave Quak: But thank goodness He did, hey? The amount of stuff you've overcome and how you've been set free is amazing. You’re real about your darkness, but you’re also such a delight to be around. You’re one of those people people want to hang out with. You know, you're "moreish."
Taneesha Luv: Okay.
Dave Quak: You know, like chocolate—people just want more of it.
Taneesha Luv: Okay.
Dave Quak: But it’s true, you bring light even in your darkness. And you're a fantastic worship leader, even when it’s hard. I know you said it makes things tough for you, but you still take one step in front of the other and live by faith.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah.
Dave Quak: You’ve grown so much. I mean, when you first started leading worship, I don’t think you were quite in a place to do it, but now you're maturing in your faith, and that’s awesome. As a worship leader, you should be maturing in your faith, not just relying on talent.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, you have to know God deeply. It shouldn’t just be about talent. But honestly, I get amped up during the week leading up to it, then when I worship lead, it’s great. But then, for the next two weeks, I get hit hard with spiritual warfare.
Taneesha Luv: And that’s not fun, especially with the whole mental health thing. But God works through it, which is amazing.
Dave Quak: It is amazing, but it’s also really tough knowing how much to put yourself on the frontlines. I used to feel the same way about worship leading—wanting to do it because it’s good for the church, but knowing it’s not going to be easy for you afterwards.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah.
Dave Quak: People need to think about that. It’s not just about the moment.
Dave Quak: Often, in church, the pastor gets a lot of prayer because they're the main person people think about. But I feel like our worship leaders need so much more prayer covering, especially with the way they shake down the spiritual realm.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah.
Dave Quak: Worship is a weapon, you know.
“May the praise of God be in their mouths
and a double-edged sword in their hands”
Taneesha Luv: I feel like worship leading often gets overlooked. It's kind of scary to think that some churches just use people up. I think there’s a place for it, but it’s a bit concerning when worship leaders are pushed above their spiritual maturity. That said, God still works through it.
Taneesha Luv: It’s definitely a dilemma.
Dave Quak: So, as someone who leads worship, why do you do it? Why do you obediently lead worship?
Taneesha Luv: For starters, I feel close to God when I worship him. It’s my way of speaking through all the tough times I’ve been through. I would write songs and lyrics as a way of communicating and dealing with things.
How to worship Jesus even when you’re struggling
On a personal level, it’s how I best communicate. But also, God is good, he’s awesome, and he deserves our worship. I’m learning more and more that worship should reflect God’s sovereignty, his majesty, and our awe of him—not just seeing him as a friend or as love, but as our Lord. I love worship because it’s revealing new things to me, and I think it’s what the church needs right now.
Dave Quak: I think so too. In this tumultuous world, we need to remember how big and mighty God is, that he’s in control, and he’s going to take care of us no matter what.
Taneesha Luv: Yeah, but to step into obedience, you really need to respect someone. You won’t just go willy-nilly if you don’t actually respect them and recognise their role. When we see God for who he truly is, it naturally leads us into obedience.
Taneesha Luv: I’m excited about that.
Dave Quak: That is exciting. At the end of the podcast, we usually ask people to pray, but you’re going to sing a song instead. What are you going to sing?
Taneesha Luv: It's actually a song I wrote a few years ago. It was my way of communicating the feelings I was experiencing. I’ve added to it at the end, refocusing on God. It talks about the mental health struggles I’ve been through, but also how things changed once I opened myself up to God’s relationship. But I still struggle. It's about communicating that journey.
Dave Quak: That’s my favourite kind of song—one that expresses raw feelings and a connection to God.
Taneesha Luv: I’m good at love and taking it all in.
Dave Quak: Is there anything else you’d like to share before we get you to pray for us?
A Message of Hope for Those Struggling with Mental Health
I just want to encourage those who are struggling that there is hope. I’ve experienced the depths of despair and felt like I didn’t deserve love. I’ve felt like my trauma and past defined me, like there was no hope and things would never get better. But there is hope, and that hope is in Jesus. The thing that changed me was learning about his unconditional love.
Before, I thought love was conditional or that I was being punished. But when I realised his love is relentless and unconditional, it changed everything. And that’s what gets me in a place where I want to worship him.
Dave Quak: That’s so powerful. I’m so thankful you joined us for this chat.
Taneesha Luv: Thanks for having me.
Where to get Christian support when i’m mentally ill
For more candid conversations on faith and mental well-being, check out SunburntSouls.com. You can subscribe to our podcast on any major provider or contact us directly if you want to book us to preach or speak. Sunburnt Souls is a faith-based ministry, and we want to thank everyone for their generous support.
If you’d like to get behind us, please pray our message reaches those who need to hear it. Feel free to donate online, but if you feel obliged or manipulated to give, you’re better off sharing a coffee with a loved one instead. I’m Dave Quak from Sunburnt Souls.
5 Frequently Asked Questions
How can Christians manage OCD and anxiety while staying faithful to God?
Living with OCD and anxiety as a Christian can be challenging, but faith offers powerful tools for navigating these struggles. Daily prayer, scripture meditation, and trusting in God's sovereignty help reframe anxious thoughts. Seeking professional therapy, including Christian counseling, and using cognitive-behavioral techniques can provide practical strategies for managing intrusive thoughts. Worship and gratitude also shift focus from fear to faith, reinforcing God's presence in every moment.
What does the Bible say about mental illness and God's love for those who struggle?
The Bible acknowledges deep emotional and mental struggles. Psalm 34:18 reminds us that "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Many biblical figures, including Elijah, Job, and David, experienced despair and anxiety but found strength in God.
Jesus’ ministry showed compassion to the mentally and spiritually afflicted, demonstrating that mental illness does not separate us from God's love. His grace is sufficient, even in our weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).
How can worship help Christians overcome anxiety and depression?
Worship is a spiritual weapon against anxiety and depression. Singing praises and declaring God's truth shifts focus from personal struggles to His sovereignty, bringing peace beyond understanding (Philippians 4:6-7). Worship rewires the mind by reinforcing gratitude, faith, and trust in God's plan. Many believers find that immersing themselves in worship, whether through music, prayer, or scripture recitation, provides a tangible sense of God's presence and comfort in their darkest moments.
Why do Christians still experience mental illness, and does it mean they lack faith?
Mental illness is not a sign of weak faith. Just as physical illnesses affect the body, mental illnesses impact the brain and emotions. The Bible reminds us that suffering is part of the fallen world (John 16:33) but does not define our spiritual standing. Many strong Christians, including Charles Spurgeon and Mother Teresa, wrestled with depression and anxiety while remaining faithful.
Seeking professional help, medication, and therapy is not a lack of faith but an act of wisdom and stewardship of the mind God has given us.
Where can Christians find support when struggling with mental health?
Christian support for mental health includes pastoral counseling, faith-based therapy, and supportive church communities. Many organisations, such as Christian mental health ministries, provide online and in-person resources. Engaging in small groups, prayer teams, and discipleship communities fosters accountability and encouragement. Seeking professional Christian counseling alongside prayer and scripture study creates a holistic approach to healing, reminding believers that they are not alone in their struggles.
